Thursday, 16 June 2016

Elisa Is Naughty

You were late for work again.
No longer can I pretend
That this is ok to do.
It's time to punish you.

Come bend yourself over my desk;
What happens next is for the best.
For staying late tucked up in bed,
I'll slap your arse 'til it is red.

You may squirm on my desktop
And shout to me "Please, stop!"
But I'll decide what is enough,
Unless you like having it rough?

If spanking for you is just great,
I hope you'll now always be late.

Thursday, 20 August 2015

Farewell, Anastasiia

Ana, don't leave me -
Leave Seva instead. 
You can stay with me
And come in my bed.

Or in the shower,
On the kitchen floor.
I promise you this:
It won't be a bore.

But if you must leave,
I wish you good luck.
You can always call
If you want to fuck.

Saturday, 14 February 2015

Be mine, Valentine

wish I could tell you "I really love you",
But come on, let's face it, that wouldn't be true.
For me, the fourteenth is about having sex,
So get to the doc for your STD checks.
As only when you've got the final all-clear,
Will I let your body and mine become near.

First, I lie down and you piss in my face,
Then you go for a dump - we'll soon need that space.
Don't talk to me; please don't ruin the moment.
I want you to sweat; I like when you're fragrant.
You push a vibrator up inside your bum;
It vibrates my cock in your cunt till we cum.

Perhaps this is not what you quite had in mind?
I guess maybe you're not my true Valentine.

Tuesday, 21 October 2014

Bernie is sick

Bernie is a sickly thing.
Autumn doth yearly bring
A glut of viruses
For diagnosis.

Her weak constitution
And wide experimentation
Has left her prone
And likely to moan.

What can we shove in her hole?
To make her feel whole?
Or use as a prophylactic,
As an alternative tactic?

So that she's in the pink,
She needs one... let's think...
Tablet of zinc?
Healthy fruit drink?
No, throw those down the sink.

No, here's The Shocker -
Bernie's best doctor -
Use double action
For unrivalled reaction!

Wednesday, 30 July 2014

Ode to Louise

Louise likes gin.
Gin gin gin gin.
But there's more to her;
Let's get under her skin.

As well as gin,
(Did you know she likes gin?)
Louise likes to gulp
The spunk of virgins.

Unlike the gin,
Because she loves the gin,
She lets the spunk
Dribble all down her chin.

From there it drips
All over her tits,
Where she rubs it in
With the penis she grips.

Then I come along
And whip out my dong
To add to the mess
On her face and chest.

Next Nathan strolls in.
Louise looks at him.
"Now you must watch"
She says with a grin.

A further thirty-eight guys
Undo their flies.
They gather round
To come from all sides.

All of her skin,
To Nate's chagrin,
Is covered in cum -
She laughs at him.

But all of this sin
To Louise is nothing
Compared to her love
For drinking gin.

Monday, 7 July 2014

Lament for Martina

Martina now has left us;
It's like she is dead.
That's how I would like her:
Limp upon my bed.

She would not protest,
She wouldn't need a gag
When I removed her corpse
From the body bag.

I would still handcuff her
Hands behind her back.
Her tits look at their best
When she's pushing out her rack.

I could manipulate her
Any way I choose.
Safe in the certain knowledge
That the dead don't bruise.

I wouldn't have to worry
About lubrication.
Her flesh would move enough
After putrefication.

And when her skin is hanging off
And I can't bear the smell,
What's left would be a perfect treat
At lunch for feeding Belle.

Sunday, 16 March 2014

Message to Bradley

Bradley, just fuck Christa, please,
Stop being such a tease.
She needs a proper seeing to;
You're the only one who'll do.

Bradley, just fuck Christa, please,
But with one stipulation:
I'd like to watch as you do and
Indulge in masturbation.

Together, you're actually annoying,
But physically both buff.
I'm sure Christa could handle both
Our members in her muff.

She can watch us getting sweaty
While we grind away.
If she's there, then what we do
Isn't really gay.

You could reach your hand around
And finger my bum.
I'll rub our schlongs off together
'Til we both shoot cum.

Bradley, forget Christa, please,
She's such an utter tease.
You need a proper seeing to;
I'm the only one who'll do.

Monday, 10 March 2014

Farewell, Anna

Anna, you're leaving;
This makes me sad.
(This poem you're reading
May make you glad.)

When you get upon that jet
I wish you all the best.
My regret? That I won't get
To motorboat your chest.

I would've liked a tit wank
From your majestic mother lodes.
You could give my arse a spank
While my load goes up your nose.

This is a marvellous story!
During my morning shower
It made me really horny.
I came with massive power
From my morning glory.

Anyway, to you: good luck,
Which obviously rhymes with 'fuck'.
But I am not so crude
As to say something so rude.
Sod it: come back as I'm in the mood
For a seedy titty-fuck!